As parents, all we wish is for our kids to find success in their lives. And many a time, this is what will come in the way of their learning. Are you shocked? Can I ask you to stop and think for a while? Instead of letting children learn stuff on their own, we often keep instructing them what they should be doing and what not. I personally believe that this is not the way to go if you want your children to grow! True learning happens only from within. The more we push our thoughts and beliefs onto our kids, the lesser original they become!
Remember, when the force is from the outside, the egg breaks and a life is lost, but when the push is from the inside, the egg hatches and a life is born!
I understand that though you are open to the thought now, and have understood the gist of it, you wouldn't have a clue of how to go about it. Worry not, for I have listed a few ways through which you can take the backseat, and let your child learn stuff on his/her own!
Let them choose
We parents are used to making every single choice for our kids, be it their clothes or be it what they eat. I'm not saying that you entirely stop doing it. What I'm suggesting is that you can allow your children to make their own choices. Allow them the freedom of own choices, and let them experience the consequences of their choices. If you are concerned about their choices, what you could do is inform them what effects their choices could have. And you can always be the Dark Knight, a watchful protector!
Let them fail
Do you think successful people have become successful without experiencing failure? The only way to succeed is to know how failure feels like. Parents often impose the idea of perfectionism on their kids, and keep insisting that they just cannot fail. Believe me when I say this, you will only be making your kid unaware to failures, and when they happen to face one, they will break down. Not a pleasant thing, is it? Talk to your children about failures. Tell them it is okay to fail. Tell them that failure is the best opportunity to learn how to succeed. That is how true learning happens!
Don't be a surveillance drone
I have seen few parents turn into surveillance drones, hovering over their kids in order to keep an eye on each of their moves. At times, they even intervene and make the move on behalf of their children. Tell me, when you played chess or carom, did you like it a little bit when someone else intervened and made a move on your behalf without you asking them to? I'm certain it is very irritating. Then what do you think your child will feel when you intervene to fight their battles? In order to let your children learn on their own, you must choose to stay away when required. Every such chance you provide your child with, is a pathway for your children to learn something on their own. I agree there will be times when you may have to help. But you must choose to suggest them, and not instruct them!
Can you stop being your child's Go To App?
Quite often, parents just give out answers to their kids without letting them have the opportunity of finding the answer on their own. If your child has got a question in mind, encourage him or her to find the answers by themselves. Do not turn into Quora that will have instant answers for questions. The learning that happens from your answers can be forgettable. But the answer that is explored by the self, the answer that is obtain by the self is very difficult to be forgotten by your child!
Show your kids the beauty of reading
When a person reads something, that reading will unveil all portals for him to learn new stuff. If you manage to pass on the love of reading onto your child, you'd have gifted him/her with the best way there ever is to learn on one's own! Books speak volumes through those open pages. Let your child grasp all of them. Tell them how beautiful and soul warming the habit of reading is!
and then, and I remember how I used to hunt for answers. That way, I have learnt many things in life. I'm sure you have such stories too. It all comes down to say one thing. Let your children learn on their own!